Hi, all! Thanks for putting up with my recap break last week. I was travelling, where I learned that selfie sticks are indeed a real-life thing that people actually use! Even though I fall squarely between Liza’s real and fake age, I felt a little like our erstwhile heroine discovering this factoid about kids today. Onward!
Liza and Josh are at the gym doing crossfit. Ha! Josh peer pressures her into the workout, saying he wants this to be their thing. The trainer reads a disclaimer that anyone 40 or older should proceed at their own risk, which is a thing that I do not believe would happen in real life. Nevertheless, it’s funny. Which basically sums up my feelings about this show. Liza gets to it.
At work, they’re prepping for the book launch of Shedonism, by my beloved Jane Krackowski. (Hence the Tina Fey GIFs, but you guys get me.) It’s a mainstream fiction title about three middle-aged, newly single women who make a “slut pact.” I just recap, folks. They go over the party details, and Hilary wants to invite Anton, because he’s alone in the city as his family is in Sweden and also because she has the hots for him. We will not ask why an editor is at a publicity meeting, especially for a book she is not working on.
Liza is limping and her boss Diana wants to know why if she’s such a spring chicken the workout was so hard on her. But she gets distracted by Jane, smoking in her office and laughing while reading her own book. (Heh.) Jane complains about the party being in the meatpacking district because that neighborhood is so over (double heh), she wants something cooler. Diana puts Liza in charge of the party, as she is a millennial who knows all about what’s cool these days.
Liza gets a text from her ex and runs to Jersey for lunch because she has time to do this in the middle of the day? He wants to sign over the boat deed to her, because he’s in more gambling debt. And then he can’t even pay for their coffee. This is why you’re always involved with your finances, folks. (Love you, Suze Orman.)
At work, Diana tells Liza that the party better go well, and that she won’t be attending. Seems Diana and Jane used to be besties, but Jane refused to go to rehab and Diana was over her out-of-control ways. Liza simpers, clearly thinking about her ex. Diana is more cut throat.
The party! Debi shows up ready to finally get with a newly single beauty blogger she’s been lusting after. Hilary’s publicist friend shows up with her crew and is hilarious. Josh arrives and is adorable because of course he’s the best fake TV boyfriend you could hope for ever.
Get down on it, girl.
Debi flirts with her blogger, who stands up to reveal that she is pregnant with twins. Ha! This show.
Hilary and Anton flirt. Jane makes a drunk toast that Liza tries to save. Jane sees her dealer — whom Liza wouldn’t let in earlier — and runs toward him, only to hit a glass door. The phones come out as people start snapping pictures, as a wasted Jane smashes her face again and her nose starts bleeding. Liza freaks.
Debi’s into the pregnant blogger, so off she runs for preggo sex. Sure! Publicist friend whose name I can never remember is psyched because Jane running into the door is now a viral Vine. She’s pumped for the publicity, Liza is horrified.
Liza finds Jane passed out and Diana there to help. Liza spins the Vine as good news as they hoist Jane and carry her out. Diana does that thing TV characters do where she talks about her plotline in a way that makes Liza think about her own life. Diana opines that a good friend would let Jane hit rock bottom so she could get help, but Diana is bailing Jane out because it’s work.
TWIST: Jane tells Liza to be careful with her hands, they’re a dead giveaway, meaning Jane totally knows Liza is lying about her age! As she gets Jane and Diana into a cab, Liza sees Hilary and Anton making out.
At Josh’s, Liza is exhausted. Josh says Jane’s problem is that she’s clearly in her 40s, but acts like she’s in her 20s. They make out and it is adorable except filled with lies.
Liza heads to the boat with Dave, and tells him no, she’s not going to help him. She’s not going to keep bailing him out.
At work, Liza tells Hilary she saw her with Anton, and that it’s not the best idea for Hilary, as she could become known as the editor who sleeps with her author. Hilary tells Liza to cut it out, as she’s not her mother. Cut to Liza skyping with Kaitlyn, where she can mom to her heart’s content.
Until next week! For more of our recaps, click here.
Header photo courtesy of TV Land.